Classic Red Wire

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Wailing Shabba's picture

Editor’s note: Years ago, during the old iteration of The Red Wire, we unwisely opened the page up to the losers who read it. The result was this giant piece of shit.

Chris's picture

I always hate being the bearer of bad news, but sometimes it just can't be helped. There is a scam out there, being perpetrated all across America, every single day. If you personally haven't been a victim of it, then I guarantee a family member or neighbor has been. Not only is this scam vile and twisted in its own right, but it also just so happens to attack one of the most critical and beloved of American traditions...the comics page.

Chris's picture

Ahh, the amazing ab belt. If you've watched tv for more than 30 seconds in the past 6 months you know exactly what I'm talking about. The magic device that will give you washboard abs without lifting a finger! Sure you've got to take repeated jolts of electricity to the gut, but you don't have to lift any fingers!